TROUBLE WHEN HE WALKED IN (BLUE LIGHTS, PART 2)

Being alone was amazing. I WAS DANCING ALL OVER THE ROOM. 
MY HAIR OPEN AND ALL OVER MY FACE AND EVERYWHERE. I FELT AS IF I WAS A ROCKSTAR WITH A MESSED-UP LIFE.


"Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in
So SHAME ON ME NOW
I flew me to places I'd never been
Til' you PUT ME DOWN, OH!!"


SHOUTING OUT THE LYRICS AT THE TOP OF MY VOICE. BELTING BELTING BELTING IT OUT TO ANYONE WHO COULD HEAR. BECAUSE NO ONE COULD HEAR.


I'm telling you. I had to get it out. This is how I deal with my insecurities when I don't feel a connection anymore. 


And while shouting, I paused and opened our messages on my phone.


He was online.


And I smiled. 


Didn't text him. Just smiled. And shouted and sang again while staring at "Online" the whole time THINKING HOW HE ABSOLUTELY HAD NO IDEA.


Don't get it wrong. I don't like him romantically. Not even one bit. BUT WHAT DO I CALL THIS FEELING?? INSECURITIES?? 


What I am, what I feel, and how I deal with my madness might be something way more special and something really rare. 


And I intend to protect it.



~Insane Little Brunette. Blue lights.